I should say that I have known since the first minute of my life or at least since I can walk that one day I would be a fitness trainer. Unfortunately (or fortunately because this way I know much more about the discouraging feelings before starting to workout), it’s not that simple.
When I was a child I was totally average, I played in the garden, climbed to trees, used my bike whenever I could but later in school we had soooo terrible PE lessons that I started to hate sports. I wasn’t good at sports, I wasn’t good at ball games, I couldn’t run long distance and of course I didn’t enjoy the classes. However, when I was about 14 and started secondary school I put on some weight (stress, bad food at school, lots of sandwiches, hormonal changes, etc) and on a Christmas I looked in the mirror and didn’t like what I saw. I decided to start working out at home, I purchased some VHS tapes (Cindy Crawford and Hungarian “famous” tapes) and worked out almost every day and kept a strict diet. Too scrict. I wasn’t the most clever teenage girl on Earth, I guess. I’m 171 cm (5’7”) and I weighed only 47 kilos (104 pounds) and stopped having my period. I got some medicine to start my period and it helped but it helped to put on weight, too. I reached the weight of 64 kilos (141 pounds) which shouldn’t be a lot but it looked awful because it was a fast gain and my body was very soft and looked terrible. So I decided to lose weight again but in a more intelligent way. Because of the many hormones I got, losing weight became terribly difficult. But I didn’t give up, moreover, it only made me better at everything. I trained better, I ate better (this time with normal portions – no more anorexic approach), everything was better. But slow. My body didn’t change too fast. At that time I hated that. Really hated. But now I’m happy that it happened this way. I learnt to like my body. I learnt that being skinny is not desirable and not everybody can be skinny AND healthy at the same time. I started enjoying my workouts. I started enjoying my diet.
I worked out a lot, I tried many different styles of workout. It became my passion. It became my antidepressant. My mood booster. My antistress tool. At university I struggled a lot, I didn’t enjoy my years (being a full time student besides working full time is not that much fun) and I felt if I hadn’t had the opportunity to train, I would have needed to take antidepressants or stress relief pills. Fitness was my drug.
I liked working out but I never felt I’m good enough. I felt I should be ashamed of my performance. I thought everybody was better than me. Yes, my self-esteem wasn’t at the highest peak. I imagined personal trainers to have huge past in professional training, decades of full-time trainings, I didn’t even dare to dream about becoming a PT.
Then I met my boyfriend.
We both worked a lot, so we had to manage our freetime perfectly to be able to meet and spend quality time together. We both needed to workout. We both wanted to meet each other. So what? We started to workout together. Before the first time I was very nervous. I didn’t want my boyfriend to see me sweating, with red face, in my training trousers. Yuck. So, our first time was very ridiculous. I asked him not to look at me :D We were facing opposite direction and did our separate workout in the same room. I was sooooooo stupid :D Later I became less problematic and we started to train together. Really together. First of all, it made our relationship better. It brought us much closer. I was happier than ever. And I started to realise I’m not as weak and miserable as I thought because we often did the same workouts and I often suprised him how much I could do without sweating. Oh, I forgot to mention one thing. He was (still is) a kettlebell instructor, among the few first RKC2s (yes, he was among the best and he is still among them – he has leveled up since then). He trained hard. And I trained with him. This was the time when I realised I couldn’t be as bad as I thought.
So I started to dream about becoming a trainer. And one dark night, before falling asleep I plucked up my courage and confessed him (literally whispered) my dreams of becoming a trainer. He didn’t laugh at my idea but told me it was a good idea.
So, this is it. I saved some money and started my school. I became a group fitness instructor.